I am honoured today to have a guest post I wrote about my Australian/Asian identity featured in Jocelyn Eikenburg’s Speaking of China website.
I have been a fan of Jocelyn’s work for ever so long. She writes passionately and openly about Asian Male/Western Women relationships, and her website has a range of views on the subject. And on navigating Chinese culture in general, including some controversial bits – one of my favourite is her list of sexy terms in Chinese.
Someone has already asked me in a comment on her site – why did my marriage end? It may be a shock to some readers, as not long ago (while contemplating some of the better times in face of crisis) I wrote about how I met my husband. Those early days when Mr Taiwanxifu was courting me (i.e. when he would ‘zhui’ 追 or chase me,to use the Chinese term), are among my happiest memories. I truly wanted to focus on the positives in my writing and in my life, but sadly after several years of trying to overcome insurmountable differences I must admit that the time had come (and past) when I ought to have said goodbye.
As to New Man? Well, the early excitement of our chance connection did not pan out to the type of relationship I would have wanted. It is not the right time for either of us. As they say yǒu yuán wú fèn (有緣無份) – there is fate but not destiny. He is a wonderful man, has inspired me so much and supported me in his own subtle way, and I hope (despite the fact that thoughts of him still make me swoon) that we can stay friends.
Still working on my egg identity. I write a lot more these days on my Ms Frugal Earsblog, including on frugality. This explains why I am a bit silent here. But I am still determined to write my book on zuo yuezi, and my ‘egg’ connections still reappear in subtle ways in my writing. It is, afterall, a part of who I am.